Did you come so far to quit?

Frustrated, defeated, angry, heartbroken and devastated I want to quit and so badly I want it that I am trying to leave everything behind. Everything I build from scratch, everything I loved beyond the margins of patience. Everything that meant the world to me.

Because I am done.
I can’t do this anymore.
I want to quit. I am sick and tired of waiting.

And I am trying to open my fists and let go of it but it’s frozen.
Open it, open it.
Why am I not able to open them?
God, why?
Why?
Why?

While I am struggling and struggling hard to open my fists my mind is questioning me, battling me.

Did you come so far to quit?

I told it to shut up but it’s my mind I am talking about which is talking about me.

  • Did you not know this is how it’s going to go?
  • Did you think you will never fail?
  • Oh you thought they will pat your back to be who you are?
  • Were you not aware of the fact that there is a price to be you?
  • Did it never occur to you that you are the one who started this for a reason?
  • Didn’t you feel this is meant to be?
  • Have forgotten how difficult it was to get started?
  • Have forgotten the reason you started for?
  • Have forgotten your own story?
  • Have you forgotten how many stones were thrown at you to choose to be where you are today?
  • Have you forgotten the price you paid to reach here?
  • Don’t you remember all those sleepless nights?
  • Those days when everyone was having fun and you were sitting and working all day long?
  • Don’t you remember when every time they made fun of you, you chose to go back and work harder?
  • So you came so far for nothing?
  • You are going to quit and prove everyone right about you?
  • So now all that sweat, tears and blood you invested in this thing you loved more than yourself means nothing to you?
  • Is it for the first time you lost. Didn’t you face bigger things than this?
  • If you didn’t crack before what made you you think you will fall apart this time?
  • Aren’t you the same person who made it till here so what made you think you cannot take it further?
  • This is not the first battle of your life, you have been stabbed so many times but aren’t you still alive?
  • Since when you started fearing darkness?
  • Didn’t you choose to be a lone wolf?
  • Don’t you remember wolf is not meant for the circus?
  • Have you forgotten moon is your destiny, you can’t settle for stars?
  • So what are you thinking?
  • Did you come so far to quit?

No, you didn’t.

You came here to rule. You cannot quit and you will not. You will finish what you started. So if you are done thinking and over thinking let’s get back to the game and get back what was always yours.

The mind doesn’t stop questioning but I did stop struggling with my frozen fists and started walking towards the moon because I didn’t come so far to quit.